I came home late tonight - caught a bus just before ten and walked through the door to find a cold plate of spaghetti around 10:30. The bus ride was surprisingly long considering the empty streets and empty bus stops. I had time to sort through some of the thoughts flying through my head, and finally settled on planning out my paper due on Wednesday. It's a study on cultural sexuality, the differences between what the Mexicans accept and the expectations we exchange students have about appropriate behavior. It's not going to be anything serious; it's mostly just a kiss-ass way of getting out of doing the actual assignment.
Anyway, that was all way too serious for me at 10 pm on public transit. So I started thinking about this boy I've been crushing on for too long, and how I'll be leaving soon and it's all going to end. "Oh baby, I was bound for Mexico. Oh baby, I was bound to let you go." All sorts of sappy girl-with-a-crush thoughts ran through my head, over-analyzing and the usual. Then I stumbled upon an idea that made me smile. I could use my paper to find out if he likes me. (Oh dear God, did I really just write that? Am I really going to post this? Now you'll all know that I'm still 12 and asking Jessica to ask Eli if he thinks I'm cute.) Using all my school paper excuses, I could find out if the way he puts his arm around me at the bars (sigh) is just a Mexican touchy-feely thing, part of all the cheek kissing and lack of personal space, or if it's because he like likes me.
I'll probably write about my issues with men and personal space in the paper. The rest is staying here. Besides, Nick says it's obvious to the brick wall on the other side of the street when I'm crushing on someone, so I don't think I need to sink myself lower with not-so veiled hints.